EP 57: YOUR PASSION IS YOUR MEDICINE — HERE'S HOW TO FIND IT

Grounding Before The Anthem

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Welcome back to Not Alone with Melissa Sue Meffin. Today, this episode is gonna move you. As we approach the 250th anniversary of our nation, we will celebrate the national anthem and its true meaning. For me, it's all about hope and remembering that this song is about unity and not division. I have the honor to introduce you to a dear friend and fellow author, Randa Stratton Dutcher, who will sing the national anthem for you. But before, I want you to just pause and take a deep breath beforehand with me. To place one hand on your heart and one on your belly, close your eyes and take a deep breath in. And a slow exhale through the nose. Let's do that one more time. Because music is meant to be felt throughout the entire body. And I want you to remember what the national anthem, why it was written, and how it is meant to be felt. So welcome today, Miranda.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Oh say, can you see bright ones early light? What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming, whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight or the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming and rang the bursting gave proof through the night that our flag was still saying or the lamb. Thank you. Thank you.

Hope Over Politics

SPEAKER_02 2:55

Thank you for happy. Oh my goodness. Randa, when you sang, I hope that everybody feels that at home too, because I felt it throughout my entire body just moving through me and in your voice. That's the power of your voice, and also the power of the words of the national anthem and why the purpose as to why it was written. So I love that you reached out to me and said, I have an idea for a podcast together, and you've said I want to talk about the national anthem. Yeah. And and how we've forgotten that it means all about hope. And I said, Yes. And I love the timing of it. Today at my son's school, they celebrate the 250th anniversary of our nation. I'm like, okay, God, this was important today. Yeah. So I'd love to hear more of what this the national anthem means to you and when you're singing it.

SPEAKER_01 3:58

Yeah, um, so um I guess let's just start a little bit with the history of the national anthem. And I want to preface this with, I am not a historian, um, but I am a feeler of music and I have musicality in me. So meaning that when I sing words, I can put volume and tonality when I sing with those words and make them mean or feel differently. I I don't know how I have that, but I do have that. And so when I sing the national anthem, I always pray beforehand that anyone within earshot of my voice, whether listening to it in that moment or later on, will feel the love of God and that angels will assist me to do the very best I can and any humanity that comes in, that they will take that and wipe it out and go to each person in the audience or wherever they're listening, and that they will feel of that love and they will feel hope because it's not about politics, it's not about history. This song, no matter your nationality, no matter your culture, upbringing, or religion, it is about hope. If you understand how this song came to be, how this poem came to be, and then came to be our national anthem, it really is miraculous.

SPEAKER_02 5:21

Yes. Oh my gosh, Vanda, I feel that that you pray before. And I love that because we you are reaching, you are powerful. Thank you. Because I feel that. And I felt that before when I heard you sing the very first time. And I did I did feel God's love moving right through me. And I know everyone at home will too, because that's how powerful you are. And we are at a time where we need that more than ever. Yes, where we don't can't forget that that hope, and also that this is not political. I love that you mentioned that because I do feel sometimes the national anthem is used politically. Right. And it's used to divide us. And we need to remember that it's about hope and not division.

How The Song Was Born

SPEAKER_01 6:12

Yeah. It really is, it's an anthem of not just hope, but also victory, and that we as humanity continue to get back up over and over. So to get back to, I said we'd go through the history. Let's go through a little bit of the history. So it's 1814, September of 1814, and there is a man on a ship, a British ship, as a prisoner in the bay outside of Fort McHenry in Baltimore, Maryland. And the British are furious because they've lost the Revolutionary War. They just took Washington, D.C., and now they're coming to Baltimore, which is the third largest place in the United States at that time, or the colonies. And um, so this man, Mr. Beans, I can't remember his first name. Mr. Beans is on the ship and he is prisoner, and he has some influential neighbors and friends, and they reach out to Francis Scott Key, who's a lawyer, and he reaches out to a to someone else who works with getting prisoners back. And they board this British ship. They go in a tiny boat through the bay and they go to this ship and they end up being there almost a week. And they end up staying there because the British has decided they're going to bomb Fort McHenry and they're not going to send them back and allow them to warn anybody. So they're stuck there kind of as prisoners as well. And on the day of the bombing, let me back up a week before, or a little bit before this happened, um General Amistad, I think his name was, commissioned this widow to sew of the flag, the red, white, and blue flag. And ironically, she used English wool. And it was very large for the time. And he wanted it to be a symbol. And a flag is a symbol of unity of, hey, we're still here. If you play capture the flag, you know, when you capture that flag, you've won, right? And so this flag was so symbolic as Frances Scott Key set on this ship, or prisoners and any of the ships that were watching the fort be bombed. Is the flag still there? Is the flag still there? And bomb after bomb and smoke after smoke. And I'm sure the noise was horrific. Not knowing if the flag was gonna still be there, if the fort was gonna still be there, were the British then going to win, and um, what would the the outcome look like? And so it's fascinating to me that it wasn't just one hour of bombing. It was 25 hours they bombed the fort. And this fort had a thousand soldiers and only four men died, and that flag was still there standing as a symbol that we're not giving up. We are united and there is hope. And I think that in itself is just like the best message of the whole song. We as humans fall down over and over, and if we can just continue to get back up after one hour of bombing, or 10 hours, or 25 hours, or whatever it is in your life, that is the message of the song. And so when I sing it, there's that part where um it says the flag was still there, and I connect that really deeply and then hit home banner yet wave. Because if we can have our own banner, if we can find our unitedness in a in our in our humanity that we are working hard, no matter what you're working hard at. You're working hard to be human, to provide for your family, to have a job or learn and grow. And if you can acknowledge yourself for that and feel that, then I think that we can find a lot more unity. And so I love uh singing the song, not only for that, but to hopefully begin any sporting event or rodeo or whatever event it is in a space of unity. And that two minutes, if you can feel hope and I can feel hope, and your neighbor feels hope, whether you speak it or not, it is felt. And that to me is way more important than anything else.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

Yes. Oh, that is so beautiful. Exactly. You're planting love in of unity before any game, any event. Yeah, that probably raises the whole vibration of that event and people who had maybe possibly given hope because you don't ever know who's standing beside you and what they're going through.

SPEAKER_03 11:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:00

And that's providing them a little bit more love that they needed. And I think that is an important message nowadays with everything, the noise around us, is that don't let the noise get you to go into fear or give up hope for our nation. And because there's power in us being grounded and believing that there's always hope and love always wins.

SPEAKER_01 11:27

Right. Right. Right. And the national anthem isn't the national anthem of any political party or person. Um, it is the United States national anthem, but it is also a mess that message of hope so that anyone, anywhere, wherever you hear those words, it is poetic. People across all kinds of different Christianity religions love the song. Um, Oh Lord my God, when I an awesome wonder, that song. I guess it's beautiful. I don't know. I don't know, but it's beautiful. How great thou art. How great thou art. You know, you can go to um a Southern Baptist church or a Christian church or uh, I don't know, a Protestant church, and you're gonna hear that song, How Great Thou Art. And so when you have that message that can cross barriers and boundaries, I think that that is really miraculous. And the fact that it did become our our nation's national anthem, it wasn't in the front running in the 1900s, um, but it kept people having hope and eventually it did become our national anthem.

SPEAKER_02 12:37

And I think it should remain that way, right? And not be misused to protest and different things like that, because it's to provide hope and that's and to have so much respect and perseverance throughout our lives, and we can't forget that. And yeah, and I'd love for you know the audience to get to know you as well because you are perseverance, you have hope, you are such a light, but you haven't you've had some really dark times yourself, and I think this is probably why this song really touches you, because you never never gave up hope. And if you're okay with that, sharing, you know, some of these struggles and what you've gone through.

Divorce And Finding Her Voice

SPEAKER_01 13:19

Yeah, um it's interesting. I I um I went through a very difficult divorce. Let me back up. About uh 2003, my dad, my dad was uh physical therapist, he's passed away now, but he's a physical therapist and he always had charts. And when he would make contracts or declarations, he would write it in these charts. And so he gave me a chart and a contract that asked if I would please audition for all of the major um athletic teams in the valley. And I didn't sleep for days, and I I didn't want to do it, but I went and did it. I didn't make any of the teams. Um, and then I went about my life and and then I ended up getting a divorce in 2011 while I was pregnant with our fifth child. And ironically, I lived next door to my dad, and he just really helped me to gain a lot of confidence. And also through other friends, Joyce Brenton, who you've had on your show, um, I hadn't been singing and and I had gone to her and I was feeling really crummy, obviously. And she said, Well, what do you want to do? And I said, I'd like to start singing again. And she said, Okay, well, let's do it. So she was going around teaching vision board classes, and I would sing a couple of songs during her class. And then eventually she let me kind of co-teach with her, also, which really built my confidence, not only in that way, but also I was selling cattle on Craigslist and I had a baking business. And so I was doing all these things that were so outside of my comfort zone that um divorce and having five kids as a single mom wasn't even that scary anymore. Making a phone call to a local rancher to see if he wanted my 350-pound calf I just bought at the auction. Um, that was much scarier. And also loading that calf and hauling that calf and backing in the trailer. All of these things taught me a lot of confidence. Um, but it was it was also a big struggle. And um, I cried myself to sleep most nights. Um eventually I was able to join this cowgirl group, and the leader of that group asked if I would sing the national anthem at one of the rodeos we were performing at. And I was like, yeah, I could do that. And I just kind of started singing more and more at rodeos and honed in my craft, and then um cowboys and cowgirls and production staff would come and give me little tidbits of, hey, what if you caught our attention with like this? Oh, say, can you see that should be your attention grabber? And so listening to all of that feedback really um again built my confidence over and over. And then um I got remarried to my ex-husband, and we are now this is our 11th year of remarriage. Our 12th, no, this is our 12th year. 12th year of remarriage, and I mean that's in a nutshell, but there's there's so many uh levels and layers to all of that struggle from depression and anxiety and also um suicide ideation. And so through that experience and then through Kira, our publisher, I've written some books and um and really wanted to write about our divorce and remarriage, um, and which we are finishing this year. So it took us 12 years almost to get that done.

SPEAKER_02 16:56

Yeah, you've got a lot of projects, you've got a lot of books that you've written. Yeah. Can you tell us? So there's a couple of them here. Tell us about some of the books.

SPEAKER_01 17:05

The first book um is a collaboration book with 16 other authors and myself. Um, and I brought these authors together uh with the publisher, and we all wrote on a subject of something that broke us, some relationship that broke us. So we have um, I wrote specifically about um body dysmorphia and also suicide ideation. Um, my husband wrote about a broken relationship in a business partnership. We have divorce, we have uh loss of um a parent, loss of a partner, um, being a child of divorce. So lots of different stories of people that broke in different relationships, but then were able to rise even in that brokenness. Um, and then my second book is a children's book called Do You Have a Gift Shine Bright.

SPEAKER_02 17:54

I love this one. I love this one.

SPEAKER_01 17:56

Yeah. And I wrote this um with um my grandma in mind and my mom, and how they really encouraged me to share my gifts. And realizing that when Joyce helped me to start singing again, that's when I started building confidence and being happy again. And I want kids and people everywhere to feel that you do have a gift. And when you dive into whatever your gift is, it could be organization or cleaning or athletics or music or being a friend or being happy. It could be so many different things. And so it goes through a day of my childhood at school and um just noticing other people's gifts and conversations with my grandma. And then at the end, there is a list of about 150 different gifts that kids can circle or parents can circle.

SPEAKER_02 18:47

And so you know, like yeah, everybody, that's an important message that everybody has a gift.

Gifts Singing And Nervous System

SPEAKER_01 18:51

I don't have to be the athlete, I don't have to be the musician, I don't have to be the best friend to everybody, but I do have gifts, and if I can accept that and use those, then happiness is happiness.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

I'm curious that you mentioned that because oftentimes we feel stuck or we get unwell, or maybe depression, because you were probably not stepping into using utilizing our gifts. So when you had a suicide ideation, were you using your voice then? So you're probably suppressing that so much for so long, and that confidence almost your divorce got you to step into because I do feel divorce is like grief, a loss, right? And with a loss, we can rise, right? We grow, right? And you needed that growth to step into remembering that you love to sing, yeah, and remembering and singing is such a nervous system regulation, right? And probably move through so many of that grief. Because when we grieve, we have to move through that emotion. Yeah, so that probably allowed you to heal so many parts of you that had been wounded.

SPEAKER_01 19:58

It did, it did, yeah, absolutely. Um, and I lost my train of thought.

unknown 20:06

Keep going.

SPEAKER_01 20:06

Yes, I love it.

SPEAKER_02 20:09

Happens to me all the time. It'll come back. It'll come back because it's important. Well, I I do feel that to bring so your book to say you have a gift, and then it says shine bright, right? And to find that, and most importantly, don't compare yourself. Yeah. Just say, I want that gift. No, no, no, find your own. And oftentimes we've got to be willing to be honest and removing the veil and and uh be confident in that gift. Because oftentimes we're like, oh, me, like for me, use my voice. Yeah, uh, my voice matters. Yeah, I should have a podcast, I should be on social media, I should be speaking on stages. Like, wow, this is complete opposite to what I was born with and my own beliefs, right? That I'm the shy girl, that my voice doesn't matter, that I've suppressed so much, suppressed my voice so much to the point I ended up with a cyst on my vocal cord. I mean, God was speaking, use your voice. Wow. I mean, he that was loud and clear, to the point that I have this surgery to get it removed, and then I can no longer speak for a couple of weeks. I'm using a whiteboard to communicate with my kids. So God was bringing me in. Oftentimes that's when we get ill. Yeah, he's drawing you back in. Yes, okay, listen to me.

SPEAKER_01 21:25

You're not listening. Yeah. And that was the message of my divorce. I felt like I'm pregnant. I have to take off my wedding ring now. And I've I felt so humiliated that, and I I don't mean that anyone else should feel that way, but in my own mind, I was like, this is, I was married and now I'm not married and I have and I'm having a baby. And that in my in my perception of that, I just felt so lowly. And many times God just said, Well, I just want your heart. And you kept not giving it to me, and I want your heart. And so I had to learn over and over to give my heart, give my heart, and also sing wherever, whenever. I and I even would put out a text message. It's my goal to sing 10 times this month. And people would call me, hey, we're having a family meeting. Would you come sing this hymn? Or it's so-and-so's birthday. Would you go sing happy birthday? And I would go do those things. And just using my gift, what even it wasn't for 70,000, 80,000 people, it was for just a few, but it was still using my voice and practicing that gift, which again rec regulates my nervous system. And so it's a little bit selfish, I think, in some some form. But ironically, also when I have struggled most with suicidiation, it's the comparison. And sometimes when I see other um vocalists getting opportunities, and if I start to compare and I go down that road hard, it comes up really strongly. And it and it is a good reminder that no, that is not my opportunity. And I don't need to compare myself. My opportunities are my opportunities, and I need to listen. And so that's coming back to um the national anthem. I had a dream with Denise Sally, our our co-author friend or our author friend. Um she does sign language in this beautiful white buffalo dress, and she is of the Cherokee tribe. And I want to do a music video of me singing and her doing sign language. And I don't know how to get this off the ground, but this is the movement I want. I want to start speaking more about the hope of the national anthem and bringing different cultures together and different um religions and people of different uh ways of thinking that we can all be united in this thought that you got back up, I got back up, we can be on common ground.

SPEAKER_02 23:56

Yes, yes, building that bridge of unity. I see that. Yeah. And writer, because we were both on Rider's Island too. And that was exactly it. We're showing that we we had, you know, like you said, so many different religions, so many different backgrounds, but we still prayed together. We still united together, we still banded together to say, you can do this, you can write these powerful books. So I can see that, I can see that for you doing that. I think that would bring a lot of power and unity. And that's where I do feel we need to remove the fear of binding together. Oftentimes we like to stay in our little bubble, but let's open up our hearts. Yeah. And open up our heart in seeing what other people, their beliefs, or how they pray or how they do things, and just more with love and compassion, you know. And it doesn't mean okay, you're following suit. You can still be strong in your own faith and your own beliefs, but just have an open heart, right?

SPEAKER_01 24:58

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 24:59

Yeah. I think that would be really beautiful. I thank you. I do see that, and we'll pray for that for you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. I think it's an important message. And more than anything, I believe that music and using your voice is something that's being called to for you to do. And I think I think everybody should sing, no matter what. I mean, I'm not a great singer, but you know what I do before I get to podcasts. I crank out the tunes in my car. And there's something that moves through you, and it that stagnant energy just moves through you. So I do feel you even teaching people that feel like I can't sing, say, no, everyone use their voice. Because even for me, I'm telling everyone they should write a book. You know, I never thought I'd be a writer. And actually, in fact, we we met in August 2023 because I thought I was going to this healing retreat in Cave Creek, this beautiful resort. And I'm like, oh, fun. I just I only hadn't done one other women's grieving retreat. And I found that I came home so much more grounded for my children and so much more at peace. And I thought, oh, oftentimes as mom, as you know, you it's so you take care of everybody else. So it was time for me to receive. And when I signed up for this event, I really thought it was just another grieving uh retreat. And you were sitting there right behind me. I remember your presence. And then I realized you guys were all authors, you were all entrepreneurs. And I'm like, what am I doing here? I'm a dental hygienist.

SPEAKER_01 26:33

Yeah. Like, who brought the supermodel? And then I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_02 26:38

And then Kieran was there posting it, and it was called Ignite Your Creator. And then we ended up writing so much. So now it was like, I was never a writer either, but I tell everybody they should write. Everybody should sing. And I really do see the power of those two. And in choosing the words, I think words hold so much power. I think that's important to say. Like, I do feel the natural anthem. These words hold so much power, and we have to be so mindful what words we're listening to, what words we're speaking. Yes. Because you know, Jesus says it can be life or death. Right. So choose one. Right. And so keep on saying, keeping us stuck and saying, we are broken, we are this. We'll keep on being broken and being stuck. So be mindful, say no, we are united, we are love, we are light. Yeah. These are the words that need we need to keep speaking. So I think it's important to teach uh others to use their voice, no matter how the the beauty of it is. No comparison. No comparison. Because I think if everyone just started using their voice more, yeah, how many people are so, especially I find women have a hard time wanting to use their voice or they were shut down so much. And then all of a sudden they're getting a lot of gut autoimmune issues and gut health, and and it's affecting them. So I think you, I think you should, I don't know, got bind together everyone and uh to sing more, no matter what, without judgment.

SPEAKER_01 28:18

Thank you. Thank you. You gave me chills, and something I hadn't thought about is teaching people to sing the words because singing isn't just about music. It is, I I believe it is the vibration. You know how we have singing bowls, and you love the singing bowl, and it vibrates through your hand and it vibrates your eardrums and you move it from side to side. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yes. And I feel that vocal cords do the same thing for your body. And I can't remember where the vagus nerve is.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

The vagus nerve, right here, right behind here. Yes, yes. It's all connected.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

And then you're connecting the breath with it. And I you talk so much about breath. Yes. Using that breath and using the vibration of your own vocal cords is very healing.

SPEAKER_02 29:02

Yes, yes, because oftentimes, you know, our shoulders, we hold all the stress here. So to be like when I I was just recording some audio, some meditation with breath, and then all of a sudden I started humming on the exhale because with the vagus nerve right there, the vocal cord, this is where we we are stuck, and of course, so much affect it. Now our environments affect our nervous system on a daily basis. So, yes, you teaching people to sing, to use their voice, and it will be like a prayer and release any stagnant energy and it'd be so healing. How fun. How many people you know block themselves, say I'm not a singer, but just avoid that. Almost like you know how now they do uh I think it's called ecstatic dance where they put, you know, blind shades and just don't look at yourself, don't look at anybody else dancing, just freely dance. We should freely sing. Yeah, don't compare, you know, my voice to yours, you know, because there's a bigger portion about singing that's healing to you on the nervous system regulation, on a whole of emotional healing. Because I I truly believe after we've been blessed and meeting all these powerful authors, I have no doubt that a lot of these illnesses are from suppressed emotions. Yes. And what a fun way to release these suppressed emotions through singing and dancing. How fun is that? I love it. You know, we just need to sing and dance more. I that's what I feel to move through these stuck emotions. These I like my first book, The Silent Killer. Suppression is the silent killer.

SPEAKER_01 30:37

Yes. And I have to acknowledge you the courage it took to write your story, to continue to talk about such a deeply painful subject, not just for you, but for others, and to continue to walk through that pain. It it encourages so many of us as authors about everyone that listens to your podcast, that we share your podcast with your book. And I know that you've had, I know you've had direct results of people telling you that it has really saved them. But just know it, it's not just for those that um are struggling with suicide or things like that, but it also is your courage that is just as inspiring as your words. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 31:20

I felt that. I felt that and I felt that love. And and that's always hard to receive sometimes because I don't I'm like, oh, it's just bigger than me. It's a calling ever since my husband passed and to speak the truth about suicide. And because hiding from it will not serve anybody. It will not serve my children. And and it has been powerful. The more that I speak the my truth, the more it allowed others to speak their truth and to ultimately I want to come in as a friend that I I I wish I would have had to say, hey, you don't have to go through all of this, start noticing, planting these seeds, you know, to start noticing that your body is speaking really loud and clear, and you don't have to wait till it's really bad, right? Where you get really ill to start changing, to start making a move, to step into your power to make that first step. Uh, really, it's it's a passion for allowing people to feel joy. You know, that's when I want people to really truly see their light. That's how I felt actually on Rider's Island 2. I did feel so many of the authors, you know, to be there as a co-leader was a different role. And I was like, wow, these women are also powerful like yourself. But I could see how there was that self-doubt is still there. Yeah. And I just like, no, I want to shine this mirror and like see how I see you, and most of it see yourself how God sees you.

SPEAKER_01 32:50

Yeah.

Quieting Comparison With Truth

SPEAKER_02 32:51

And don't ever forget that. And I think that's forgotten so much. And that keeps people from really stepping in because it is fearful to step into your power. But you mentioned earlier about how loud it was when there was a comparison. And that's that's it. It does get loud. I always say God's voice is more of like a whisper. The loud ones that keep you know stuck, yeah, they're loud. Yeah. They're loud. Do you have tools for those, those loud voices? I mean, for me now, uh, sometimes I say more with prayer. I just I just start in prayer to allow more light or breath, or something. My friend taught me saying, cancel, cancel. That was oh yeah, I love you. She's like, cancel, cancel. I'm like, oh, I like that. I'm like, that's a good tip. So I'm always curious when when you do recognize those loud, you know, because they'll keep coming back, right? It's more about awareness now. Yeah. So what are your tools now to quiet those thoughts?

SPEAKER_01 33:49

I want to acknowledge one thing about what you said about Rider's Island. The women on that island, I will say I I did feel some comparison maybe the first day or two. And then it felt like everyone opened up. And I stood in my light, you stood in your light, Sandy stood in her light, Haley stood in hers. Everybody stood in their own light, which gave more permission for every one of us to continue stepping in that light. And that that was huge, such a huge breakthrough of this is what I want everywhere in every group of women. Yeah. There's no comparison. Like we have Haley and I both sing, but we both sing different, and we both had moments of singing, and that was just so beautiful. So you're breaking the chains of perfection with sharing your light. You're breaking that that stigma of I have to be perfect, or I'm ashamed that I'm not, or I can I can't be like this person, so I can't do that. But to answer your question on um, how do I, what tools do I use to let go of comparison? Um I have some trusted friends that sometimes I will speak to. Um, another tool is a truth list that I learned long ago from Steve and Joyce Brenton. Um, and writing the truth, even down to my hair is this color, I live at this address, my name is this, I have accomplished this and this and this. Anything that you could prove in a court of law as a fact. Because it takes the spinning out of it. It takes the story you're making up of the results that may or may not have happened and just gets you down to the facts. That makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 35:31

Yeah, it's like removing the illusion.

SPEAKER_01 35:33

So if I see someone else if I see someone else singing um in a in an arena and I wanted that opportunity, I might say, Oh, why didn't I get that opportunity? Well, that's a story I'm making up about something, an opportunity I saw for them. But the truth is I have my own opportunities and I'm making my own opportunities. So I can either stay stuck in that comparison story, which I made up, or I can take a step back and say, okay, I didn't get that opportunity. But what opportunity am I gonna go after now? Who can I call? Who can I talk to? And I'll call um a rodeo committee or a friend, hey, do you know how I can get into this place? Or I'll send an email to the sons or someone, hey, do you need anybody? And sometimes I get chosen and sometimes I don't, but eventually I get something.

SPEAKER_02 36:24

And it probably the more you truly believe in yourself instead of you know the comparison, more opportunities start happening, and the ones that you're meant to be there. I guess if you see it where you're mostly meant to be at, and also just seeing it that way, just seeing okay, I wasn't meant to be at that place, I'm meant to be called somewhere else, or I was meant to be just more present at home this week. I wasn't supposed to be there. Yeah, you know, it wasn't my it wasn't my time.

The Houston Rodeo Breakthrough

SPEAKER_01 36:50

Yes, yes. Um, I recently had uh do we still have time? Oh yeah. Okay, oh yeah. Um I had a really miraculous opportunity occur. Um, the Houston rodeo is one of the the largest rodeos in the nation. And um I've wanted to sing there for quite a while. And through miracles, I met someone who knew someone who knew someone and assisted me in meeting people, and then I created a resume and a packet with links and just kept submitting that. And then um this year our family to I should say, our family planned a family vacation to Africa over spring break, and we were gone, we were gone for two weeks. And about a month before I um was actually listening to a podcast with my dad that we recorded before he passed. And all of a sudden I got a text this is so-and-so from um Rodeo Houston. I'm wondering if you can sing for us on May 21st. And I just like it was I hadn't showered, I'm in my pajamas, and my husband walked in and I put my phone down and I just started sobbing. And he knelt down and started sobbing, and I was like, I don't know how I can do this. We're going to Africa for two weeks, and the 21st is the day after we get back. Oh wow. And he's like, We'll make it, we'll make it work. So it was a lot of um scary things, but everything fell in line. And I could go, there were so many different tender mercies, but to be able to sing on that stage for 80,000 people in one of the largest arenas of the nation, and um and be able to have that opportunity was such a blessing. Wow. How did it feel? Like what would it feel to be 80,000 people?

SPEAKER_02 38:36

That's a lot.

SPEAKER_01 38:37

It was different in a lot of different ways. Uh I had in-ears, I'd never done that before. Um, there was fireworks, there was um a trick rider running around, and they in Texas, um, in that stadium, they have a star for the stage that looks kind of like a dome like this, and then it goes out and it's a five-point star. And at the end of every con every rodeo, they have a concert by a big star. And the big star stands on that star and sings and it rotates at the same time. So the national anthem, they put one point down and you sing towards the flag. And um, so it was just it was huge. It was so big and a little overwhelming, but it was mighty amazing. And then I came back home and a week later I got asked to sing at The Suns and just sang this last Tuesday. So it's like things are happening, and I feel like this is a God thing for me to start talking more and more about this, not for my own glory to continue to sing, but to share my gift of how I interpret this song. Yes, and um yeah, and just that's it.

SPEAKER_02 39:43

Miracles start happening when you say yes. That's it. I think you, your how different it is is that how you said you pray. And as you sing, I felt it deeply. I felt like God's love all over, and that's what you can ripple in in more than 80,000. You're gonna speak, you're gonna sing it. I don't know, maybe the White House. All the events, everybody. Yes, because that's the power you have. That's your gift, that's what makes you different. And I want this episode. Somebody's gonna be listening and be like, wow, this is what I want the crowd to feel. This is what everybody needs to feel right now. And uh, I see that for you.

SPEAKER_01 40:28

Thank you.

Sisterhood Unity And New Books

SPEAKER_02 40:28

Yeah, I see that. This is powerful, Randa. I'm so proud of you. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 40:32

Yes, from the time we met in King Creek, we are both very different in in lots of ways, completely different.

SPEAKER_02 40:40

And of course, the stars all align. And I'm so excited for Riders Island to be out soon, you know, because that's gonna be powerful. Oh, season one coming out.

SPEAKER_01 40:50

Yes, yes, so excited to watch that.

SPEAKER_02 40:52

It will be very exciting just to, I think that's where I'm seeing all the authors. There's a momentum right now. We are stepping more confident into our power as these episodes will come out because I think that we are that unity. We're gonna show that. We're gonna see all different kinds of backgrounds, all different shapes and sizes of women. And what to circle back to what we had mentioned before, how we were all women first came. Some of us have been hurt by other women. So there's like these armors, yeah. But those armors were released when we were on the island, and we just really bounded together. And I think that is so beautiful as women. I've always felt that. I mean, I uh growing up, I have two wonderful sisters, but that we have a big age gap. Okay, so I grew up mostly only child. So friends and sisters are that's what I called them. Yeah, it was always sisterhood, and I'm always been the one, I'm like, oh yeah, seeing you rise, seeing some of my friends that are doctors and leaders and singers. I'm like, yeah, yes. And I do feel that we need to be more like that for women. Yes, and instead of comparing ourselves and to inspire each other to lift us up, yeah, because there's a power of us women gathering together. I know on the island we we witness some powerful healings. Yes, when we all put our hands on somebody and pray over them and and use each of our gifts that we have when we're touching that person and sending that love. Yeah, there's a power into healing the world. Yeah, right. If we come into unity. So I do feel a big shift right now where I'm called to help rise women and step into their power through remembering their gifts, remembering to listen to their bodies too. Yeah, because it's constantly uh talk speaking to us. Yeah, yeah, because we need we need to rise. Yeah, we need to rise. We're kind of the heart of the family, is what I see. And if mom is okay, the family's okay. Yeah, you know, and so I think it's important. Yeah, it ripples, it has a ripple effect to your children, your husband, and everybody community everywhere. And um now that you were saying you're teaching people to sing. Okay, can we start with my house? Yes, I mom's always been saying she wants to sing. I mean, she has a mic in her in her little casino because she lives with us. And my daughter's been singing a lot. She's in choir at school. And I remember she told me that. Yeah, so okay, let's organize this in my house. The first one, and you said your mom plays the piano. I have no my grandma. Your grandma, yeah. Your grandma. Okay, yeah, and I have a keyboard, and we can we can start something fun because I think a family time lesson. I think that'd be great. Yeah, so I I know you have a new book coming out, so let's mention that too.

SPEAKER_01 43:49

Yes, uh, so my husband and I finally finished our divorce and remarriage book, and uh it will be coming out. It's called Third Times the Charm, a four words way. To a backwards marriage. Is that right? A backwards way to a forwards marriage. I don't actually third time's a term. That's the name of the book. And then also, um I'm currently in editing for my book I wrote on the island for Rider's Island season two. Um it's called Her Story. And it is stories of women from the Bible that I I asked to come and sit with me and kind of share their story in a different way. And I write kind of conversationally as well as what I thought, what I think they might say, my my perception of their story. And then also it has a really cool kind of Easter egg hunt about uh gems and a crown. And so I'm fascinated.

SPEAKER_02 44:46

I'm very excited for that. I like that that you're shining the light. The women in the Bible. Yeah. Oh, see? There needs to be a rise. They need to have a voice. Yes. They were not given, and you're giving all of them a voice.

SPEAKER_01 44:58

Wow. Ooh, I full goosebumps. So I feel like there might be a second book because I didn't get to everybody. Okay. Um, but I am I am very excited for this. It was quite the experience to learn. To learn from them. And um also I put a couple of my ancestors in there that I've learned from. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:16

Are you able to like a snippet of one? Like what you learn from. I know it might be hard, but might be putting you on the spot.

SPEAKER_01 45:23

But I'm actually my um, I think my most surprising um I wrote I wrote a poem or received a poem. Um, there's the little girl that was sleeping in the Bible, and Christ goes and and tells her to rise. And in the Bible it says uh tellete. Um but the n the word t it says tallita, I think in the Bible in Hebrew. But t'allit means little lamb. And so I call her little sheep. And I I feel like it's symbolic that Christ would touch her and and call him little one, little lamb, rise, and that she was just sleeping. And um, I received a poem that was really beautiful about how she knows her Jesus and how she sees him. And though her family was scared, she knew that everything was gonna be okay. And um to continue to rise even when you might be sleeping.

SPEAKER_02 46:20

Oh wow, beautiful. This is gonna be a powerful book. Yeah, wow, I cannot wait to read this. It's interesting because just in no when I was in editing and finishing up my book in December, I had Mary Magdalene come to me. Oh, in a vision, because I kept on going, show me the truth. And I wrote five more chapters in the middle of my editing. And and she came. Wow and I still was like, oh, okay, but it's still the meaning of it. I'm still okay, well, maybe because she was quite the the healer, had learned to heal. Yeah, as well, alongside with Jesus. Right. And so, and drawing people in to intuitively heal and become your own health advocate. And that's kind of what I'm trying to give the tools to do with a god connection. So maybe she was like, Okay, keep rising in that keep, you know, and and maybe she's teaching me her gifts along the way. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:14

Can I share something else? Yes, it is um a speculation and not a known truth that she may have been the wife of Jesus. And um not everyone will agree with that or with me and think that maybe that's blasphemous, but um, that is the uh perception that I wrote for her. I do learning side by side with Jesus, wife or not, and then also protecting his um his genealogy.

SPEAKER_02 47:46

And um anyway, just I feel I I got that in December. I really did. I did. Oh my gosh. I did that she was. She I mean, you know that you is. I know they do. I'm scared to name it. Well, let's name it right here. I did have that vision, and she was married. Yeah, I didn't know that. And she has a parent, right? Yeah. So yes, that's what oh, full confirmation. Yeah, okay, saying it out loud.

SPEAKER_01 48:10

And I do um I do have a gift for you. Oh, you do? Yes. Okay. Oh, yes, yes. I actually have two. So um I have wonderful parents uh that grew up on ranches, and my dad passed away from cancer two years ago. He's my best friend. Yes. And we created this um token to give at his funeral, and then we created this card a little later. But he was on my podcast and we talked about uh cowboying up, and we did like a a youth um thing where they came and we taught them how to cowboy up and taught them to ride a horse and tie a tie a tie a rope and rope a calf on the ground. Um and so I like to give this coin to all those that that emulate the things that that we shared. Um cowboy up. Break a sweat every day, smell good and dress up. When you dress better, you feel better and then you do better. I like that. Get the job done and do it right, persevere through adversity no matter how difficult. Emit when you are wrong and make it right the best you can. Be a giver and be confident in God. So I give that to you. And I have I have some for your kids too. Well, hugging them. I have one more. I have one more. Okay, okay, okay. Oh my gosh. And then I'm a hugger, so a couple of these for you also. Um it's a horseshoe, which has lots of different meanings, but to me, it means shore footed. When we talk about a horse that's shore footed, they always are very aware of where they're stepping and where they're standing. And so the horseshoe reminds me, and I encourage you to be reminded to stay and stand shore footed wherever you go.

SPEAKER_02 49:48

Very touching. Thank you. This is beautiful. Okay, now I gotta Okay. Oh my gosh, you are so beautiful.

SPEAKER_03 49:57

Oh my gosh, I love you. Oh, I feel that.

SPEAKER_02 50:06

And most of all, that this is you're you and your dad, and still living uh through you, uh, because I know that loss was really tough. It was really tough. It was really hard and and still is, and but he's you know, no doubt shining, smiling.

SPEAKER_01 50:24

Oh, I know he's coordinating all of that. All of this all the things that are happening.

Where To Find Randa

SPEAKER_02 50:28

Sure is. I got one voice from my mom, and he's coordinating opportunities. Yeah, he is. Yeah, he thinks he probably thought he could help you more. Yeah, it's from from the contest. Yes, it is, exactly. This is so beautiful and touching. And now, if people want to reach out to you for more singing opportunities, please let them know how they can find you.

SPEAKER_01 50:50

Yeah, you can find me on Instagram at perfectly imperfect randa. I'm on Facebook, uh Randa Stratton Dutcher. Um, and I do have a website, but I don't remember. You'll have to go to the link in my bio. We'll put it all in the show notes. And you are on Spotify too. I am on Spotify, YouTube, iTunes. I have uh lullabies, some song covers, and also my podcast.

SPEAKER_02 51:13

Yeah, yeah, beautiful. Such an honor. I know I'll have you on again. Such an honor to call you a friend. And I hope today, I know, I know today you will touch many by the way you sang, and they will stand up. They will cowboy up and know the flag is still up. Yes, and there's always hope. Yes, never forget that. Thank you. I love you, friend. Thank you. I love you too.