EP 78: BUSINESS GROWTH, FAMILY, AND THE COST OF SUCCESS WITH DAN “BIG D” SAKOWSKI

Welcome And Why This Show Exists

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome back to Not Alone with Melissa Sue Methvin. This is a place as to we share stories of hope and inspire others because to inspire them to never feel alone. Because when I lost my husband to suicide in 2022, what I did is actually read so many books of others who went through some dark times and how they got out. And then I started seeing a sequence of events of what I needed to implement as far as habits to get out of this dark space, to get out of this deep grief, mostly for my family for generations to come. So each guest I have on today, this is for you to learn their hard-earned wisdom, to shift your life. So you don't have to learn these hard-earned wisdoms.

Grief Sparks A New Calling

SPEAKER_01 0:49

So today I have the honor to have Dan Sikowski. Am I saying it correctly? Also known as Big D, an entrepreneur, a businessman, and it's truly an honor to hear his story and how he's achieved wealth, but also with faith, presence with his family, because finding that balance as an entrepreneur is extremely hard. As for me, I actually, from a young girl, never wanted to own a business because I saw my mom become an entrepreneur. And she had no time, no time for herself, no time, you know, she was a great mom, but just no life to achieve and hit the ground running. And I was like, wow, I don't want that. And then I see my husband owning his dental practice and kind of seeing the same pattern. So for me, I was like, nope, I want to work and leave work at home, you know, leave work at work and then come back home and be so present and not take, suck the life out of me. But now that my husband passed and I've kind of practiced, you know, God's calling to start a podcast, to start these businesses. I am now a businesswoman. And I'm finding it hard to find that balance as you grow your business. And I seem to have 10 ideas at once. And so I'm really honored that you reached out. And I think I'm gonna learn a lot from you today, and I know our audience too, because you do feel kind of alone starting from scratch and starting your own businesses. And I think it's important to learn from people like you that's been an entrepreneur for a long time. And I, you know, after reading kind of your your story and following you, I I love, I love your message. We align on so much from faith, family, you know, purpose. But I also found out that you had a heart attack in 2022, same year I lost my husband. Yeah, I'm always curious, what did you have to change? What had to die, you know, from from you? Like I always feel like there's a truth that God was trying to shine. And what what identity had to just you had to let go at that

The Heart Attack That Reset Everything

SPEAKER_01 3:23

point?

SPEAKER_00 3:23

So I think as business owners and entrepreneurs, uh, we get so caught up in the race and in and the grit and everything, and it's all about the result of achievement financial achievement, status, uh, company growth, and all the accolades that come from what you've done to prove that you can become something because of an identity that a business has proven that you've become. But most business owners are empty because when you look at business, why do most people get involved in business? Because they want time freedom, they want to be their own boss, they want to have leverage, and what ends up happening? They don't have time freedom, their business runs them, and they're under-leveraged. So for 20 some odd years in business, I continued to just build and build and build, and it all stemmed back from you know childhood chasing something that I never had, trying to fill a void. So every business was like looking for validation, every woman was looking for validation, everything I was doing was like, How can I confirm that I'm doing a good job? Because I never was taught as a kid that you know you're doing a good job, I'm proud of you, none of that stuff. So I was never told that. So I I wasn't taught on what that would actually do or not do for you. So when I had my heart attack, uh, it'll be four years, literally in a couple weeks, and I died for a moment. I my one son wasn't talking to me after a pretty bad divorce. My one son wasn't talking to me for like a year and a half. I text all my kids like, sorry for not showing up the way I should have. The cars, the money, the houses. None of that stuff matters when you're dying. And you kind of default to like all the things that you should have done. And I think when we're in business, a big word, there's two big words that are used that are not really defined properly.

Defining Entrepreneurship And Real Legacy

SPEAKER_00 5:40

First is entrepreneur. A true entrepreneur has high leverage. Uh like my last business, I was working 20 hours a week and I was doing well, and I was leveraged, you know, pretty well, but I still wasn't happy, but I had leverage. The second thing is legacy. Most entrepreneurs want to leave a legacy to their kids. If you're building and establishing a business and you're working hard and you have stuff, what legacy are you building? Like for your husband, you know, he built a big dental practice. So if he had one location or a hundred locations, that's a location. Well, what is the legacy behind that? For me, I built many, many homes. I was a developer. What legacy is that? What lives am I changing? Who am I impacting? That was my question. So when I was in an ambulance and I felt like I died for a minute after texting my kids, I blacked out. I felt like I had a conversation with God, and he's like, What are you doing? I've given you the ability to be disciplined, to do all the things that you've done, but yet you've shared it with nobody. And I feel like God's got a little game out there. I always say this like, how bad do you really want it? You get checked a number of times in life, and you either listen or you don't. And every time I would say I listened a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

Yeah, like

God’s Nudges Bankruptcy Accidents Lawsuits

SPEAKER_01 7:14

God was whispering beforehand. I give you you these little nuds. So, what were their little nuggets? Do you have an example? Like, what were the little nuggets?

SPEAKER_00 7:22

Yeah, so like 2004, I went bankrupt. First business. I was young, you know. Why are you doing it? I had no purpose. I was just trying to make money. Then the next business, and then my son, you know, fell out of a window. So that's what brought me closer to God. And then, you know, earlier before that, I get into a bad motorcycle accident, almost die. So all these different situations.

SPEAKER_01 7:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:44

It's like humming.

SPEAKER_01 7:45

Because grief and these big things kind of bring you back. Like, what's what matters, right? Yeah, you can achieve the self-worth by finding balance, right? God was kind of calling you back to find a balance.

SPEAKER_00 8:00

So when I was in that ambulance, and and he said, Hey, like, I said, I'm not, I don't want to die. Like, my son's not talking to me. Like, this isn't the way I'm supposed to leave. And he goes, Well, I want you to share with people what you know and teach people what I've taught you. Because some something came across my mind where it was like, 15 years from today, if I died right now and my kids are sitting around the table with other people, what did I say my dad did? My dad built houses. That's cool. How do you change that to be like because of your dad, this happened to my family? Because of your dad, this happened. How do you be that because of you, change happened in somebody's life? And that was my call.

SPEAKER_01 8:49

And how do you do that now? Where you because you know, you liked obviously you enjoyed developing and it provided, you know, income and provided obviously uh, you know, wealth for you, you know, for your family. So was that a passion for you that it light you up?

SPEAKER_00 9:06

That's all I knew. Like that's that was my growing up. I knew construction. That's what I knew.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

So, how did you pivot that?

SPEAKER_00 9:12

So I didn't listen to God again. And two years later, I found myself in a $3 million lawsuit because I didn't listen to God. And when that three million dollar lawsuit comes about, he's like, Are you gonna listen now?

unknown 9:23

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 9:24

And at that time I realized I give goosebums because sorry, it's it's I didn't want to interrupt you, but I I'm getting goosebumps confirmation because this is exactly the story my husband was dealing with. God kept on knocking. He talked about a lawsuit that happened for seven years for us, you know, with his own brother, right? And and so God was knocking nonstop. So I love, I hope people are listening. Because God will try to bring you back constantly. And the hard, they're little nudges. They really are.

SPEAKER_00 9:58

We always resort back to comfort. Yes, that's our problem.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 10:02

We don't ever want to be uncomfortable. We would we don't want the unknown because the unknown doesn't really tell us what the outcome is gonna be. If we just keep doing what we've always done, we know what's gonna happen. We're just gonna make money, we're just gonna support, we're gonna do our thing. But after that lawsuit was there, it was like, all right, like I mean, dude, listen. At that point, I was like, all right, I surrender and I'm gonna get rid of all my companies. And I'm telling you, the last three, four years of my life, I've got no stress, I've got no anxiety, I've got no worry. I do not make

Releasing Comfort To Find Peace

SPEAKER_00 10:40

the money I used to make, but I do not have the problems I used to have.

SPEAKER_01 10:44

Yeah, so you you have peace now. I have peace. Which we all thrive for, yeah, right? That inner peace and for your for your family. And tell me that inner peace now that you have, has it helped mend your relationship with your son?

SPEAKER_00 10:58

Yeah, my son's been back for a year and a half. Uh, he just showed up. My son now today is a business owner, calls me for advice, talks to me, connects with me, um, spends time with me, which he didn't do before. But when you come to realize that money and status will destroy you, because people say like the love of money like is crazy, but the love of money will destroy you if you don't respect it. We are supposed to have money. It's biblically stated that we're supposed to be wealthy, but your wealth is your health, your wealth is your family, your wealth is everything combined in your life. It's just not financial only. Money is a second, it's a byproduct of what you do and how you show up. And if you want it to continue to be there, then you got to keep showing up at your best self. But when you're showing up every day just to have the thing and to do the thing and to look like life is picture perfect, eventually it'll all fall apart.

SPEAKER_01 12:08

It'll fall apart. Yeah, that happened to my own family, right? That happened to Scott and I. We were picture perfect. I almost called my book Picture Perfect because the cover, The Truth Behind the Smiles, is our family picture. But I remember exactly where we were at then. And if we were falling apart. But yeah, we had the beautiful home in Alaska, we had the great office, we had a boy and a girl, and um, you know, we hid so much behind the smiles. But I do remember telling my husband, you know, as I saw slowly trickling and things kept on compounding. Like you said, God was giving signs. Even one day, he slip and fell and hit his back. And so did so did another family member that they were fighting. I was like, whoa, God was sending a message to both of them. Put the egos down. Yeah, you know, stop fighting. And uh I saw that ripple effect in our family as well, when it was like it was never almost enough. I'm like, I'd rather have, I just kept on telling Scott, I'd rather

Picture Perfect Lives And Hidden Pain

SPEAKER_01 13:12

have you as a husband healthy, you know, I'd rather downsize, do all that, give it all away if you can be present for me and for our children, right? But but that focus, I think, is really hard. And I think you are right, it's a childhood thing, right? The self-worth, never good enough. Maybe having to show dad, look at me, I can do it too.

SPEAKER_00 13:34

It's addiction.

SPEAKER_01 13:35

Yeah, yeah, okay. It's an addiction.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

You're you're addicted to whatever it is that fulfills you until the moment that you realize it will never fulfill you. And most business owners say, like, and he may have said, I'm doing it for you, I'm doing it for my family. But what do you get? You get what's left the aggravation, the stress, the no time. Yeah. And when I coach entrepreneurs, it's the biggest thing is like the first 90 days I work with you, I really want to figure out why you're the problem because you're not gonna tell me that you're the problem.

SPEAKER_01 14:08

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 14:09

And when I figure all that out, it all stems to some sort of fulfillment or something that feeds them, but yet still keeps them hungry.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

Okay. It might be, you know, for I think for my husband, the feeds them is seeing the dollar, you know, coming in, right? The production. And so he feels like he has to to keep up to that. And but, you know, his health declined, you know, never took time to take care of himself when it comes to exercise and you know, eating well. And um, so yeah, I could see how that focus and also I can apply it where I'm at now as a business owner, you know, as I'm implementing my podcast, the calm chair systems, the God blueprint, all of that I'm trying to just launch, but also as I'm making this decision, I pray. Yeah, I follow what God's leading me to do, right? And I also try and find balance and be present and and know money is not, you know, the my number one, right? It's God. What is he asking me to do? And I get confirmations nonstop. Like he asked me to start a podcast, and I was like, oh boy, it took me like a good four months to get started, but now haven't stopped, and I see why he wanted me to do that, right? And um, and then it was just like, okay, you've got to be in this documentary, you've got to be this, you know, the dental community. That's so clear he wants me to be there. It's so clear. He makes it kind of opens these doors. Do you see that for yourself right now? Always, yeah. Now that you've made that shift, that he'll just almost make it, like you said, you create more peace. So there's more an ease to it. It's less grind. Yeah, I work a lot, you know. You grind, you there's a purpose, but it's different when it's aligned with faith.

SPEAKER_00 15:52

Before it was hard to let go because when you let go of something, it's hard to trust the unknown.

SPEAKER_01 15:58

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 15:59

Because you're so content with the life that you have, knowing that, like, if I just need more, just do more of this. If I just want more, do want, you know, focus here. So releasing and trusting that this is not for you and listening that, hey, I'm I'm gonna put this person. And I always tell people that like we're on an elevator with God, and we continue to go floor to floor to floor. And the problem is, is people stepping out are stepping off the floor. Things are being put off on that floor, but we're the ones who want to pull them back in. And we know that there's so many things in our life we need to release. So, like when I was married, we had a picture perfect life. Facebook made us look real good, everyone looked good, and then we file for divorce, and it's like, oh my god, I thought you guys were the perfect couple because that's what we want the world to believe, because that helps the identity we're trying to create.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 16:56

And um, when you release all that pressure, and all that pressure is gone, it actually becomes easier to move in life because you can actually breathe. When then going through all those situations, you're you're pulling for oxygen. Yeah, you don't know where to go, what to do, and how much stress. And living in a place where, you know, I mean, you've suffered a major loss and a lot of pain. Though you have to grieve through and go through it, there's probably a lot of pressure that you don't have to deal with every day that you were dealing with before. And though you'd rather have your husband here if you had to deal with that pressure for the rest of your life, just knowing the things that you had to go through. The same thing. Like, I didn't want to be divorced for my kids, you know. But then again, I'm like, what's better for them?

SPEAKER_01 17:39

Yeah, you know, so and then often parents will stay because of the kids, right? Or things can shake change, or there's hope, but you feel that presence and they feel you know the truth. And it often affects you your health as well, staying in an unhealthy relationship. It's almost it's hard. I think the the marriage, you know, death to us apart, right? Health and sickness. And sometimes I feel that contract keeps us in unhealthy relationships when God's saying, okay, I think we this has to be done, right? Letting go of something for something.

SPEAKER_00 18:14

My parents stayed married till I was like 18. So for 18 years of my life, I didn't know what love was. I never experienced it, I've never seen it. I didn't know how a man should treat a woman. So when my daughter comes up to me at eight years old and goes, Why aren't you sleeping in bed with mom? I said, I have to make a choice because if I don't make a choice now and I wait until they're older, my daughter is gonna live in the same world I live in right now.

SPEAKER_01 18:41

Yeah.

Faith Reconnection And Being Uncomfortable

SPEAKER_00 18:42

So it was my turn to change the dial.

SPEAKER_01 18:44

Yeah, I love that you share that because I've been the same situation. I didn't we slept in separate rooms and for a really long time, and I kept on thinking, gosh, would I want my daughter to stay in a situation? What am I teaching them? So I think this is so important for people to understand. Because yeah, just like you know, mentors, we're the mentors for love, right? What does a healthy relationship look like? Yeah, there's gonna be ups and downs. I'm not saying let go, oh, the minute's hard. No, but show healthy communication in conflict, show showing up for each other, doing the work, growing together, right? Showing hard uh communication conflicts, but showing these behavior passive aggressive and just the silent treatment and and just all of that that we think we're kids can't see, kids can't feel, they do, and we are their mentors for life. So what are we trying to teach them? And same now for you. You're a mentor for business, right? So it's important to look at people, be like, what have they done? What have they learned? You know, I I you know, I'd love to learn from you, you know, because for me, I learned so much from people that got out of the dark, dark spaces. Okay, what are they doing? They, okay, wake up with gratitude, meditation, prayer time. I did so much work on myself. I still do. This will be a lifelong thing. I invested in me, which I think is so hard for people to do. And I think as an entrepreneur, you also have to kind of invest in probably the knowledge and aligning with the right people. This is where I think it's hard as entrepreneurs who are you gonna align with because you can't do it all by yourself. So I often just kind of pray. I'm like, okay, who am I supposed to bring on to help me with this, right? Create this course, right? Or whatever it is. And I often just will pray and and oftentimes it just makes sense who it is. You know, someone will come into my life and I was like, okay, they align with all my values, right?

SPEAKER_00 20:44

It's because you're going through a season right now, and you gotta find people who've been through the season who can help you through the season, who can walk you through the season. And I think so many times in life, you know, we don't do that. We oftentimes talk to our friends, talk to our family because we want them to talk us out of how we feel or what we're doing, but they can't really give us the advice for where we're going. As an entrepreneur, as someone who's really trying to grow, the resource of that destination has to come from someone who's lived it. But we're not taught this as kids. As kids, we're taught to just go through life and do what we got to do and be lucky we're alive another day. You know, if you wake up another day, be thankful for that. But there's we have so much to do in our life and so much to serve in our life, and we're put on this world for a reason. And most people undervalue their gifts because they don't ever spend time with the right people.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

With the right people. And I love that you say that there everybody has gifts. Everybody's here, placed on earth, was chosen to be here for a purpose, and God keeps on trying to get us back in alignment with that. So we gotta learn to listen to it. And yes, having the right circle around you, I find that's tremendously important. Important, you know, the energy you're around, the support, are they helping you rise? Are they giving you the same good habits? Are you are they help lifting you up now as an entrepreneur? Do you have some advice? Like for me, like it just it's it's in the beginning stages in a

Filtering Opportunities With Prayer And Patience

SPEAKER_01 22:16

lot of the businesses that I have, you know, as far as how do you focus, you know, I have maybe three, four different projects on the go. How do I should I just pick one and focus on it? You know, but I feel so many of them are all aligned with my purpose, right?

SPEAKER_00 22:35

So the first thing I would look at is which one would bring you the most joy if it were completed today? The second one thing I would look at is which one is draining more of your time than it's actually worth. And then the third thing I would look at is that if you were to be gone tomorrow and pass any of these three or four businesses away, which would be the one that you would? And when you start narrowing yourself down to what's the most important for you right now, as entrepreneurs, we're like, we become wired to like the next thing, the next thing, the next thing. But what we forget about is singularity of focus. Everyone wants everything, but if you could just take everything and put it into one thing and grow it, and then that thing is just literally on its own, growing itself, and you're spending so little time because it's literally building. Now you can focus on the next thing. So I would just I would look at what's bringing you and your family the most joy, the most value, and gonna make you feel the most fulfilled because you're serving at your highest level, and then everything else could wait.

SPEAKER_01 23:35

Yeah, that's great advice. Cause yeah, I get lots of ideas and God if God plants them, you know, because I'll be speaking, I'm like, oh, we need this and we need that. I mean, it always don't get confused.

SPEAKER_00 23:45

So God does plant some, but the devil also comes in to distract you. So when you've got something so great, the devil wants to distract you with other shiny objects that look good and other people in your life that look good. So you're distracted from the work that God's calling you to do.

SPEAKER_01 24:00

Okay. Okay, that's good. I needed to hear that. Yeah, because that sometimes gets a little bit confusing, right? As you go along. You're like, oh, which ones are distractions and which ones are not? I'm starting to figure in that out, you know, as far as I mean, for me, I know podcasting, it lights me up. And I is I learn so much, and I know my audiences too, and there's purpose to that. And I would definitely want to continue that as to why I started is because I wanted to give people the voice as well to share their wisdom, right? They're it because I don't want them to wait till somebody dies by suicide. You know, learn from my husband's story. If one legacy I can leave is listen, read my stories, listen to all these podcasts because they went through some hard times, like for you, right? As you're growing your businesses and uh tarnished relationship with your son and you know, the uh lawsuit, those are highly hurtful, stressful times and bankruptcy, losing everything. But there was little signs beforehand. If we can all learn from that and incorporate them, I think it's it's hard sometimes. People will will know the truth, like for example, I speak so much truth about your health. What's out there? What's causing us to have uh lots of inflammation? And I have a lot of dentists on, just shining the light of the shift we need to do for dentistry. But do people want to hear the truth? We often don't even want to see our own

Distractions Shiny Objects And The To Do List

SPEAKER_01 25:32

truth, right?

SPEAKER_00 25:32

We Because the truth takes work and it makes it uncommon and unknown for us, and that's the biggest thing. Like when we're little and young, we're taught certain things, but we always do the opposite because we we want to do what's better for us. But when we get older, we're taught so many things, and then we only do what's comfortable for us. So I always tell people like relate back to a kid and be resilient and and know that you can have and go after anything you want, but the minute you choose comfort, you're gonna disconnect. Right? Yeah, you wanted to walk, you walked. You wanted to crawl, you crawled. You wanted ice cream, you got ice cream as a kid. Now all of a sudden you get older and things are too far out of reach. That's not for me. Oh, I should just be lucky I have this, I should just be grateful. But the Bible talks about these gifts that we have and all these things that we can do and how we can share. You know, everyone poor me, everyone's in this whole poor me episode of life. You've gone through trauma, I've gone through trauma. It's all different. And there's no we should never size it up to anybody because it's all different. I talk about I talk about the disciples, right? They were all bad people. Some were worse than others, but God called bad to good. And he uses all the situations in our life that are bad to create the good that's ahead. Yes, as long as we listen.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

As long as we listen, yeah. Use that story for for good. Like, for example, then we can touch people's heart, be like, oh, this happened to me too. And look at, you know, look at her now, right? That's my hope is that, yeah, you can get out as a suicide survivor and your families. We uh hopefully I could be that light, like, you know, do with doing the work, you're gonna your family's gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_00 27:20

I think your kids are gaining the most out of all this because you chose not to be the victim. You've created victory from the situation to become better and to grow through it and use it as awareness. Your books, your podcasts. So, what you're doing for your kids is greater than anything you could do for anybody else because you're showing them not to stay small, not to stay stuck. We've got to grow through this and become better and show ourselves in the world of who we're really supposed to be. But so many people who've been through what you've been through fall victim, poor me, why me? And then their entire identity and their kids' identities are strapped to this.

SPEAKER_01 28:03

Yeah, they get stuck. I see that and stay in the little spiral and the the loop of victimhood, and and that's why it's so important to, you know, do the work. Like, what have you done for yourself as far as be able to go change the identities after your your um heart attack and near-death experience? What kind of work did you do for your identity and for us?

SPEAKER_00 28:28

Every time I've been through something in my life, my book's coming out in November, and my book's called Falling Your Way Up Hill. It talks about all these situations that could have broken me. Terrible. Everyone I've given the book to to read it prior to coming out, the first manuscript, they said they're crying, laughing, and jaw-dropping at the same time. Like it's so impactful. Because every time that we have a season of life, we're not supposed to stay in that season. So for me, I just look at like it was harder when you were younger and going through your first experience because you don't know how to deal with things.

SPEAKER_01 29:02

Yeah, you're not given the tools, right?

SPEAKER_00 29:04

But we're gonna go through so many bad situations our whole life. Life's not always gonna be glamorous.

Order Of Importance Family Before Business

SPEAKER_00 29:10

But how do we have the glamorous and the bad and put it together to shine at our highest? And you have to work on the way that you respond. And I think that we look at other people and we go, oh, their life is so good. People look at me and they're like, Oh, yeah, look at me, but that's why I share what I share on. I'm so vulnerable on social media. Like, I'm the opposite of all these other people. Like, I tell you about all the bad stuff. I tell you, you you're not as good as you think. I tell you this stuff like in in hopes for you to be like, oh wow, like he's not perfect. Because people see the followers, they see this, they did it. Oh my god, this guy. Like, but let me tell you about how we got here. And I think that's super important.

SPEAKER_01 29:49

Yeah, I like that.

SPEAKER_00 29:50

Nobody wants the backstory, but I want to tell you the backstory because if you don't listen to the backstory, you'll never understand the today's story.

SPEAKER_01 29:56

Yeah, true. And it's so good, probably healing for you too to talk about the truth, your truth, right? Because that's how it was when I wrote my book, too. It's so healing writing a book. You let it go, you let it all go.

SPEAKER_00 30:09

I talked about my dad in my book, and my uh podcast host read it, and he's like, Are you ready to like shame your dad like this? Like, I'm not really shaming my dad. I'm just if you really listen to it, I'm talking about why his belief in himself or whatever conditioned him to be turned into the way I started living. He never healed himself, which allowed me to carry what I carried, and I can't change him. But all I did was choose to forgive him. And because I forgave him, it he has to decide that he's got to figure out why he's acted in life the way he's acted in life, reacted to life the way he's reacted to life. I'm done. I've let it go. You know, so the story really shifts, and I'm not like my dad became who he was because of something he never dealt with at a young age. Then he turned it into how he raised me because that's all he knew. And this is the cycle of life we go through. So you're changing. So your kids went through a situation where you guys were living in different rooms and you know, sleeping two separate lives. But on the outside, if you go to know that, you're all dressed up. Everyone thinks you're a power couple, right?

SPEAKER_01 31:14

Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 31:16

But now what your kids see is that it's okay not to be okay. And whatever happened.

SPEAKER_01 31:23

Yeah, I still show that we're the we're not perfect. We're still have, I'm still navigating there, still grief. It's body keeps the score. You know, we still hold stuff. Home life is not always, you know, you have these ups and downs. And I I feel like that is important to show people that that I'm still figuring things out.

SPEAKER_00 31:40

They see you rising.

SPEAKER_01 31:41

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 31:42

And I think the most important thing that our kids can do is watch us go through every storm and come out the other side.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

Yeah, yeah, true. True. That you can still come out. You gotta do, you know, get out of being stuck and do the work. And for you, shining the light of yeah, the upbringing and how you're changing the generation because you're doing all the work and you're so were you always like um uh faithful as well? Like, how did God come into your life? Were you raised?

SPEAKER_00 32:12

Um I was raised Catholic. I call myself recovering

Presence Phones And Real Human Connection

SPEAKER_00 32:15

Catholic, um, as I say as a joke, you know, because I think that everyone's raised Catholic because you're told that you should be.

SPEAKER_01 32:22

Yeah, I went to Catholic school, yeah, me too.

SPEAKER_00 32:24

Um, but we don't understand nothing, you know, until we actually want and desire to understand it. So I was disconnected from God for probably a good 10 years. Um, but I don't think I was ever really connected. I just did the thing because I was supposed to do the thing. Yeah, but you know, if you asked me a scripture or you said something to me, or I would tell you, hey, if you sin, you go to hell, if you do good, you go to heaven, because that's what you're taught. But that's far from the truth. Um 2007, I had an incident happen where my son was 18 months old, fell out of a window, and I had met a couple of guys uh a couple weeks prior, and uh they came to the hospital. I didn't even know these guys, they came to the hospital, spent some time with me, and they called me to God. They're like, you know, I'm like, how can I repay you? They're like, you need to go to church and just give it back to God. And you know, it took me a couple different visits, a couple different places.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

And they were strangers that came to you.

SPEAKER_00 33:13

I just I met them like literally one time a couple weeks prior, but they were big Christians, and uh, I was supposed to meet them that Saturday morning, and when they found out something happened to my family, they dropped everything and came because that that was more important. So when you have actual people who are connected to God in a real way, and and really, really disciples and like pour hope in other people, they show up when you never know. And it happens in life, but we reject it. How many times have people tried to talk to you over the years about God and this and that? But you're good because you know what? Number one, you know them for who they are and you don't want to listen to it. And number two, you're not ready. You know, I wasn't ready, but I went to service at three or four or five different places over a course of a couple weeks, and I go, I need to be here. And it changed my life.

SPEAKER_01 34:05

Changed your life, yeah. I can feel that same thing, you know, after going to Catholic school, and then there's things that didn't align or make sense to me, you know, in high school, and I fell out of it too. And my husband was not raised in faith as well, so we were just not really practicing it, you know. I believed in other kind of spiritual and that definitely we're not alone, you know, always have been very extremely intuitive, but definitely God was showing up. I started seeing once I um living in the relationship and starting having health issues, I knew the one in particular is once I got a cyst in my vocal cord and I was sounding like a smoker, and then I had to get a surgery to get it out. I couldn't speak for about three weeks and use a whiteboard to like communicate with my little kids. And um, I was like, oh, okay. And I had to sit in silence. I'm like, God is telling me to use my voice because I wouldn't share anything that's going on at home, you know, because you know, we live in a small community, like how it can impact us and all these things. And so it was very clear that he was knocking and I was starting to listen. And and so it drew me closer, and I started wanting to take the kids to church with me. Scott wouldn't come, and I how important I think it is to incorporate that in your life, to find out.

SPEAKER_00 35:32

And that's the biggest problem in this world, and that's why people reject what they're supposed to be and where they're supposed to be, is because they're more worried about what the outside thinks than what he thinks. Yes. And until you are like, you know what, it doesn't matter anymore. I need this, I need to come to peace, I need something better. Life won't change for you. But we live in a society where it's if they don't think it's right or they're gonna look at me differently, I just rather not do it because that's uncomfortable for me. But we've got to be extremely uncomfortable, and the people you spend your time with now after your husband's passing compared to before, I guarantee it's a totally different person.

SPEAKER_01 36:12

Oh, it is, yeah, it is. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:14

The light

Final Message Living The Dash

SPEAKER_00 36:15

shines differently, you wake up differently. Uh the things in your life are all different. But it's because of the perspective of the people around you and and the association of people you're with where they're not judging you, they're not looking at you, they're there for you. And they would have been there for you before, but you just didn't want to connect with them because it was unknown.

SPEAKER_01 36:36

Yeah. Yeah, no, that's true. And I think it's important for people to understand that and to feel if they're feeling the nudge to do some changes and they're afraid that it just be confident because it will open up new friendships, it will open up new opportunities and keep trusting. Because yeah, it was it was scary to just um make some big moves, you know, from moving here from Alaska and not knowing anyone. But what was like the scariest move for you? Selling all your practice your businesses?

SPEAKER_00 37:09

No, the scariest move for me was trusting, trusting God, and like you know, and every time you come back and you read it, it's like you've tried to do it yourself. You ready yet? You try to do it yourself. Are you ready yet? Because he is not gonna let you fall on your face all the time, but he is gonna let you fall on your face when you need to. So it's getting rid of comfort and knowing that on the other side of discomfort, there's such glory behind it. But we want to stay in a place in life where we don't want to be uncomfortable, we don't want to change, but for things to change, things need to change, and you've got to accept that. So it's really humbling yourself and putting your pride in your back pocket and accepting the fact that everything you've done up until this point is not giving you the best of what you can be. So you have to decide, are you willing to trust it now, or do you want something else to happen? So I had so many something else's happening that I'm like, alright, I'm good.

SPEAKER_01 38:14

Yeah, so right now, what are you doing to stay so aligned and that peace? Well, I'm sure a lot of opportunities come forward too.

SPEAKER_00 38:22

There's everything, but you know, where everything before every shiny object, every good uh every every good business opportunity looked good and sounded good. Now it's like, all right, pray about it. I'll give you a sign. Don't make quick decisions where before someone says something, oh sounds good. Yeah, let's get let's get together. No, now I just need to listen. I need a little bit more information. Let me think about it, and I'll get back to you. Give me about a week to get back to you, and then I pray about it. And should I meet with someone? Should I not? So this guy was supposed to be on my podcast. Great example. This guy was supposed to be on my podcast next month. And uh I don't know, something felt very off. And then I had this other girl, Jen, on my podcast. She's one of my clients, and uh, she also has her own podcast, and he messages her and says, Hey, uh, I connected with you through Dan. Would love to be on your podcast. So on our coaching call, she's like, Hey, do you know this guy? He said, He he connected with me through you. I said, First of all, I never gave him your information. Second of all, he probably saw the picture that you were on my podcast and just hit you up. And third, he's probably podcast hopping because what's in it for him? He's trying to launch a book, he's trying to do something. I'm launching a book too, but at the end of the day, like, whatever. Like, that's not the I want to help the audience, I want to give them something and serve them something. Hey, you buy my book, cool. You know what I mean? You don't buy my book, whatever. But after her saying that, I then messaged him and I'm like, hey, uh, oh no, he actually messaged me. He's like, hey, I just talked to so and so, I don't want to say their names, so and so, and uh, they had a lot of great things to say about you. And you know, they were just on your podcast, it was great. And uh, like I said, I had a coaching call with her, and she's like, I'd say anything about you. So I messaged the dude. I'm like, hey, bro, like just a question for you. Like, you fill out the intake form. We're a little bit unclear about why you want to be on this podcast. You know, our podcast is about resilience and grit and fear and things that you've overcome to become who you are today. Can you tell me a little bit about you know why you want to be on our podcast? Then he sends me this chat GPT thing, this whole thing. I'm like, whatever, dude. I said, you know what? Like, you're not a good fit, nothing. And I just decided not to have him there. Because you realize that you know, people and things will come into your life. And maybe a year ago I would have just let them come on. But now I've got to protect my time. So you start seeing whether it's an opportunity, whether it's a person, whether it's a relationship, whatever it is, and you've got to look at it and say, Is this gonna feed me good? Or is it gonna leave me hungry? And then don't react and don't say yes in the moment. Take it back to God and ask him, Yeah, is this for me or is it not? How many decisions I don't make anymore? Like, if I want to buy a new car, let me pray about it. Yeah, I do the same thing versus making an emotional decision.

SPEAKER_01 41:24

Yes, actually, I love that you say that. At some point, I do the exact same thing. I pause more because sometimes I was really fast to move things, you know, along. And then I'm like, okay, I have to put on the brakes a little bit and spend more time in prayer. And then oftentimes I'll ask him to give me a sign. Like, am I supposed to do this? Right. And sometimes I do have to move fast for some of these decisions, but I really uh implement prayer in asking for a sign. It could be simple as I don't know, some for me, I love uh birds, right? Different birds coming uh to me or a song that comes up or something that aligns. He'll he'll find ways that I just get it. And that was the sign. And uh I love that you do do that as well, because once you you see proof of that alignment, like you also listen to that intuition about that gentleman that you shared, right? And I think that's so important for people to trust in their intuition leading up to business and um their lives as well, because sometimes you'll get that nudge and you're like something feels off. And you could have felt bad, say no to this gentleman, be like, oh, I'll just do it, you know, because I know same thing. I've got a lot of people that ask, and I'm like, oh, I probably should and want to do it, you know, give them a chance to, but I love that you say, well, you got to protect your time, protect your energy, protect who you surround yourself with. With you, 100%. I knew we aligned so much on a lot of things, right? So I knew it would just be so fulfilling, right? Fulfilling for for me mostly, you know, me, my family. I learned so much. And I know it'll teach so many other people listening as well, as to learning from your path. You know, we need to do that, we need to share that. We're not gonna learn that um, you know, at school right now. You know, we're we're just not. And so this is life school. And I think we weren't, most of us were not given those tools as a young, you know, boy and girl, because oftentimes for generations it was like, don't talk, don't show emotions. Uh, we got to provide for your family. For women, just stay quiet. Um, I know for my lineage of women, it's like stay quiet, just appease and uh overgivers, and but that has to stop, you know. We gotta find a balance. And I think it's important to lead, to be cautious who we are present with, how we make decisions. And to pause.

SPEAKER_00 44:01

The lesson is to be less reactive because so many people are so reactive to the moment, to the thing. And just take a minute and pause. You know, and you're not going to crash and burn if you actually look at it and keep your eyes wide open.

SPEAKER_01 44:15

Yeah. I'd love for you to share like how you you kind of signal something. You're like, watch out, the devil will come with little shiny things, you know, along the way. And I'm like, gosh, I'm I know this. And that's why I try and protect even just my whole body, like health-wise. So that I'm so filled with so much light. And um, it'll just I'll be able to be intuitively be able so clear to see it, because sometimes I'm not so clear to see that. And I loved, do you have examples where you know the devil was kind of shining something shiny, just maybe something recent in the last couple of years, and you're like, no, I see that and took a different path.

SPEAKER_00 44:53

Yeah, so it could even be a relationship, you know, where someone comes in your life and you're like, Oh, this person's cool, we align so well, but then you go, Do we? You know, you might think you do because hey, the person is a joy to hang out with or spend time with, but what are they really doing for you? Where are they really bringing you? And I think a lot of times people enjoy the comfort of um companionship and you know, having someone uh go to dinner with, go to the ballgame with, go whatever, but how's that person lifting you up? You know, and if you really sit still for a minute and you ask yourself if it's a business opportunity, if it's a person, whatever it is, what's the good out of this? Like, what am I looking for from this instead of just being active in a moment? It's like the sugar, or you want to eat the sugar right now because it's gonna make you feel good right now, but then after you eat it, you go, why did I eat it?

SPEAKER_01 45:44

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 45:44

So what did I post this morning that you reposted? The calendar, right?

SPEAKER_01 45:48

It's about all the things that we say we do, but do we really?

SPEAKER_00 45:53

Let's look at how we react to our day. Let's look at what we're doing throughout our day, let's look at what our life is actually putting out versus what we're spitting out. So when you dial everything back, yeah, because what was it?

SPEAKER_01 46:06

You said something like your presence, right?

SPEAKER_00 46:09

Yeah, like you say you're present for your family, but are you really? What do they get? What's left of you? You know, you say you're faithful for God, but you know, when you talk about God, most people only thank God when good things happen, but they're not there when bad things happen. They don't have gratitude for the bad, just for the good, right? And uh maybe it's uh your business, and you talk about how important your business is to serve other people, but are you just doing it for money? There's all different examples. Yeah. But if you look at really how your life is playing out and how your day plays out, and you lay back at night and you lay in your bed and you go, okay, well, like what were the benefits of today? Everything I did today, how did I serve? How did I show up? And what could I have done better? Most people don't go to bed that way. They go to bed with like, okay, I gotta start all over again tomorrow. It's the same thing, or you know, this was not accomplished because they just run on adrenaline or they run on, you know, just chaos. Yeah, and that's not a way to go. Like, check yourself. So people come into your life for a distraction. Things come into your life for distraction. I always talk about the to-do list. So when you look at your house, you got two lists, you got the to-do list, and you know, hey, this today, tomorrow, I gotta get this done. But then you have a distraction. I'll give you an example. Saturday, my son, Saturday, Saturday or Sunday. Yeah, Saturday, my son's like, hey dad, you want to go ride Harley's tomorrow? Because my other son wanted to ride. But on Friday, he told me he was gonna go clean out his shop, he's got new shelves, he's gonna spend Sunday all day cleaning out his shop. I'm like, I would love to, but you've got to go clean out your shop. He goes, No, I don't have to. I go, you have to. He's like, Okay, dad. And then the accomplishment on Sunday of cleaning out a shop, doing everything you have to do, putting the shelves up, and even though it took him 12 hours to do it, he's organized. He went to a new week, a new way. We could ride Harley's whenever, but you've already committed to doing something, but what sounded more fun?

SPEAKER_01 48:03

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:04

This is what happens all the time.

SPEAKER_01 48:06

So true.

SPEAKER_00 48:06

How many times have you canceled a lunch meeting, a this meeting, a that meeting, or uh an appointment because someone wanted to go to the beach or someone wanted to go to the lake, or someone wanted to go get a massage? Because what sounds better in the moment? It's also reactive to the pain that we have to go through versus the fun that we're gonna miss out on. But you got to miss out on fun to gain some more later on.

SPEAKER_01 48:33

Okay, I think I needed that message, and I think a lot of that too because it's distractions. Always, it's always it's always that's why I'm like, oh, working from home. Yeah, oh my gosh. The days that I'm working from home and there's kids at home, and there's I really feel it'd be beneficial to find a little office outside the home because yes, distractions non-stop, and I actually set your boundaries, yeah. Setting the boundaries, yeah. That's a big topic for me. Setting boundaries, and I think being clear of the daily habits to achieve your goals, right? Where do you want to be and what would be the most fulfilling? So staying focused, I think is very important.

SPEAKER_00 49:10

I think earlier on you talked about balance, there's no such thing.

SPEAKER_01 49:14

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 49:15

So, and I teach this to all my clients, it's not about balance, it's about importance and order of importance. Why are you in business? Well, I want to do good for my family, serve good for my family. Well, what comes first? The phone call or the family? Well, if your kid walked into your office and you were on a phone, would you say one more second, one more second? Or would you tell your client, hey, can you just hold on for one second? Hey, what is it? What do you need? Most people wouldn't do that. One second, one second. So what are you telling your kid? This is more important. But then you're telling me that you're doing it for your kid because you're you're out of order. But if you were really doing it for your kid and you were present for your kids, when you tell your kids you're gonna be present for them, they're not gonna come and bother you when you're working. But they're only bothering you when you're working because you don't give them the time they need when you're not. This is most people. So this is all coming back. So why are you doing what you're doing? Are you really? Well, let's dial this back. And then I just reverse engineer everything in their life, and they go, shit.

SPEAKER_01 50:20

And I go, Oh yeah, I've I've already had some moments, oh yeah, that was me last week, you know, telling, oh no, the kids, we just got back from vacation. I gotta hit the ground running and they're, you know, come mom, mom. And I'm like, no, no. So that was definitely me, you know, for sure. Where so what do you do next time?

SPEAKER_00 50:37

Next time we go on vacation, you give your first day back a first half day to get reset, let your kids know, hey, when we're coming back from vacation for the first couple hours when we get back to home, we're gonna get reorganized. But I do need to spend the next four hours from this time to this time just working. So anything you need for me, let's do it before and then we'll do it after.

SPEAKER_01 50:54

Yeah, I like that.

SPEAKER_00 50:55

You know, and just kind of get them engaged and get it, get them understanding. You know, my kids know, like, hey, and I tell my kids, like, I texted them, I don't know, maybe a couple weeks ago. We were at the shore, and uh, you know, we were sitting there and everyone was on their phones. And I just let it go for that day. The next day I text them, I go, Can I ask all you guys a favor? They're like, What? I said, when the four of us are together, all in the same room, just put your phones down for like half an hour and just be present. Even if we're just watching TV, even if we're not doing anything, just be present. And I just want you to tell me how that feels because we let the world control the outcome that we get versus us controlling the outcome that we want.

SPEAKER_01 51:37

I think that's a big battle for a lot of families with the phones. It's everyone, everyone, right? Because they see us, oh, having to be on the phone a lot for work and this and that. So they're like, well, I want to be on this, but to be mindful, to be present and putting away, I guess we have to show that example too, right?

SPEAKER_00 51:53

Where many times you talk to somebody and they're on their phone while they're texting while you're talking to them. I stop talking, I walk away. Yeah, you're not gonna give me your attention. Uh, I'm not talking to you. Because at the end of the day, like whatever you're texting and whatever I'm saying is going in one ear or out the other, and that's more important right now. So, and you teach your kids that how many times have your kids been in front of someone and not knowing, consciously knowing, but they're checking Snapchat or something while someone's talking to them because they don't know any better.

SPEAKER_01 52:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:20

So you gotta like let them learn. You don't scold them for it. You say, hey, listen, so-and-so is talking to you when you're talking to you. Just try not to look at your phone because the way they feel versus what you think is important, what they're telling you is important to them in a moment, and then you can go back to that later. That's not gonna go away. Your friends aren't gonna run away, your Snapchat's not gonna go unopened for forever. Like, you can always get back to it, but just stay connected with the moment. That's something I've always tried to teach them.

SPEAKER_01 52:45

No, that's important to stay connected because yeah, so many of us are so disconnected now. I think for young kids too, because they're in front of the phone and the parents are working and whatnot. And it's just um it's kind of sad as far as, but if we can showcase them to just put it aside when somebody's speaking and these new habits, we can't. The reality is they're gonna have phones, right? So, how to implement these boundaries for them that they can learn these tools at a young age. So then when they are working adults, they'll know to be present as well, to you know, find I just say, What do you think?

SPEAKER_00 53:20

How would you feel if you were talking to someone and they were looking at your phone all the time, but you had something you really wanted to tell them, but they weren't listening. You thought they were listening, but they're not really listening because they're more because they're how would you feel? Well, that's how they feel. And I challenge people all the time. Like, I love when I'm on an airplane, you know, because usually like you have an opportunity here. And when people are on an airplane, they want to have their ear pods on and not be distracted. For me, I'll keep talking to you until you take your pod off out of your ear till you want to start having a conversation. Like, we gotta sit next to each other for the next five hours. Let's talk about something.

SPEAKER_01 53:50

Let's talk, yeah. Right?

SPEAKER_00 53:51

You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 53:51

Well, you'd be fun to be sitting beside and talk, right?

SPEAKER_00 53:55

Everyone thinks I'm intimidating, right? So then I sit there and you know, you're in first class, like, who's this guy? How do you get up here? You know, is he a prisoner? You know, who knows what's going on with this guy? But you I challenge them. Like, this this last ride out here, I had like a young Asian girl next to me and the whole time couldn't even talk to her. Like, you know, just hey, what are you doing? Where are you traveling for? Nothing, couldn't say a word. But young generation. But if I catch someone who's older and in business and and can have a good conversation, they're actually genuinely excited that you're interested in knowing about them. So, what is it that you do? Why are you traveling? What's take what's bringing you to Arizona? You know, when you start asking us, well, why are you asking me this? Well, I'm genuinely interested in what why you're doing this. And nobody ever stops to do that.

SPEAKER_01 54:42

Yes, which is sad. But yeah, we have to kind of come back to simplicity.

SPEAKER_00 54:46

So it's like, don't bother me.

SPEAKER_01 54:47

Yeah, yes, exactly. Which I think we need a big shift in all aspects of life, coming back to true connection and talking. And and same, we've seen how it impacts, you know, entrepreneurship, the family. So that needs a big shift too, because we've seen too many burnouts, too many people, uh families falling apart because of it. So you're creating that big shift in that industry. Same with the dental. So I feel like we're seeing that the life has pivoted too far away from God's plan, right? God, if you know, honoring earth and being good back to our soil and everything, you know, our nutrition. So just that alone, that example of human connection, we've lost touch, right? And now, of course, with the AI and everything, right? There's benefits, there's good and bad, but you're bringing back just a simple thing.

SPEAKER_00 55:41

People hate it. I'm a connector. Everywhere I go, I want to talk to everyone. Yeah, I just want to talk to you. I don't want to know what's going on. Like, I'm not gonna be like antisocial. Yeah, I want to talk to you because you never know. If if you if you think about childhood and you think about some of your friends and some of your best connections, how did you meet them? Conversation. Yes, and when you actually have conversations with people, you realize that like your problems are so small.

SPEAKER_01 56:06

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 56:07

But we sit in this bubble where it's like we don't want to say anything because we come victim to our life, and this is it.

SPEAKER_01 56:13

Yeah, I love it. It's such be I feel like I could talk to you forever, but is there like a last message to people just from uh your life? I know your new book coming out and how they can, you know, just follow you. I mean, your content is fantastic. You have your own podcasts as well. And um yeah, just to inspire them to live a life. I would just say don't give up.

SPEAKER_00 56:37

Like, don't, don't, don't think that you're at a point in life where you've hit the ceiling. Most people don't ever reach their greatest potential until after 40, 50 years old, until some kind of life situation, until some kind of life tragedy. Why wait for the tragedy to happen to change who you are to become? And I always tell people like, I didn't know the day I was gonna be born, I didn't know the day I was almost taken away. But what I do know is that I didn't fully control that hash in between. Now the only thing I have is the joystick for the rest of my life that I'm here, and that could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be a hundred years from now. But I can only live in a moment and control going forward, backward, or staying in neutral. And I'm the only one who can control that. So know that that dash is the only thing that you have control over and that you can guide. So don't live tomorrow as if it's someday, because someday may never be here. And that's all I simply have to say. You know, live in today, yeah, live in the moment, and if you want to do something or you want to be a part of something, do it. People always tell me, like, if I tell you I'm gonna connect you with someone, literally the second we're done talking, I'm sending a text seconds later, and they're like, You're very quick. I'm like, because if I say I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna do it. I don't want to be like, oh, oh shit, I forgot to do that. I would rather just do it. How easy is it to get it out of the way and just do it? And this is life, this is evolving, but most people don't want to evolve.

SPEAKER_01 58:14

Yeah, yeah. They don't want to get on out of the comfort zone. Yeah, but even there's benefits to the mind, the brain, you know, getting out of the comfort zone all the time. Because the the beautiful thing, once you do get out of the comfort zone, you're so proud of yourself. You're like, oh, I did it, you know, and then you want you crave more and you crave, you learn to trust it, right? Like you said, it's the hardest part was trusting. But once you trust it and you start seeing that you feel so much better, there's so much peace, there's so much good that happens, then you crave that. Now you learn to trust it even more. So that's my hope as well is that people, you know, surrender, they uh step out of their comfort zone. And also I like how you you talked about prioritizing, you know, prioritizing and be careful of the, I think your big message too, be careful of this distractions. I I don't know if I know I needed that, you know, be careful of the distractions. And I think a lot of us do not it need that to keep focus and what truly matters.

SPEAKER_00 59:15

I always dial it back to like you know, you go to your favorite restaurant or you go to a restaurant and you know what you want to order, and then the specials come out.

SPEAKER_01 59:24

So true.

SPEAKER_00 59:24

And you look at the specials and you're like, oh, that sounds good. And after you eat the special, you're disappointed and you wish you ordered what you wanted. That's a distraction. When you've made your mind up to know that you deserve and want this, stop looking at this. And that happens in business, it happens in life. And that's that my book literally shows that it shows so many things about this. And I've taken a lot of time with this book. I've sent it out to high-level people, and I said, Can you just please read this and tell me how you feel? My goal with this book, everyone wants to have a book. My goal with this book is impact. I need to impact people. So I'm taking my time with it because I want to make sure that after the reader's done, the reader's like, Man, my problems are small. Man, I can't believe I didn't do this. Man, I can't believe I'm letting that hold me back. It's it's about about resistance and resilience and knowing that life's gonna give you as much as you want, but only allow you as much as you deserve.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:29

I like that. I can't wait to read your book. So, how can people, you know, follow you?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:34

Sure, yeah. My biggest platform, you can find me on dansakowski.com. Uh, my book is followingyourwayuphill.com. We have a like a pre-launch site there, following your wayuphill.com. And then uh my biggest platform where I spend most of my time is Instagram, uh Big Dan Official. Um, if you message me, I'll message you back. And that's really the only platform where I spend a lot of time on, but I do have everything else.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:55

Okay, well, I appreciate it. Thank you so much for reaching out. I'm truly honored, and I definitely learned a lot, and our audience will as well. So you are making an impact and you will continue. I think writing a book, I tell everybody to write a book because it's healing, you know, healing yourself, first of all. But yeah, your story, it will have a ripple effect. 100%. Yeah, it will, it will, they will not have to wait till um something a tragedy to happen because they've read your book.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:25

Don't write a book or do a podcast for the money, do it for the impact.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:29

Yeah, absolutely. That's why I'm here. That's why I'm here. So thank you very much for listening to Not Alone. If this episode touched you, please share it. Like, subscribe. And like every episode is because I truly want no one to feel alone. And I also want you to learn these wisdoms and start listening to God's whispers because he's always knocking, he's always giving you these little signs. Your body is always speaking as well. These little illnesses are trying to pivot you on the right path and be careful of distractions, like Big D said. All right, stay tuned.